Teaching An Old Chicken New Tricks

You have heard the saying you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, well we all know it is not true. You can in fact teach an old dog new tricks and you can teach an old chicken new tricks, too. Not those weird tricks you see at carnivals in small towns where the chicken can do math. Who needs a chicken that can do arithmetic? No, real tricks like jump for the Doritos. Now I am telling you, you have not seen a chicken get air like Michael Jordan until you have baited them with Doritos. I know what you are thinking, how did the revelation of chickens love for the tasty, nacho cheese chips come to light?

Well, it all started one peaceful, warm summer evening when the whole family was outside enjoying the balmy night. We were in our lounge chairs bored out of our minds getting eaten alive by the mosquitoes eating you guessed it Doritos. Well, that sparked the interest of the Girls. Now, I read somewhere that chickens would eat mosquitoes, but I can attest that the Girls have not made a dent in the mosquito population in my backyard. In fact, my Girls refuse to eat anything that is alive like a worm, bug or mosquito. So if you are considering chickens for the pest control benefits forget about it.

So, we have determined that the Girls don’t like normal chicken fare like bugs, but who would have thought they would like Doritos? So, I am in my lounge chair lounging, yelling at the kids and stuffing my face with Doritos and Twinkie jumps up in my lap. This in itself is not out of the ordinary. She is quite the snuggle birdie. But then she went after my Doritos! She snatched my chip right out of my hand. Now, they are chickens but they are not uncivilized. They don’t just normally take food from Momma’s hand well, not Momma’s food. Oh, but they could not resist the Doritos. Soon the whole flock was gathered around me clamoring for a spot hoping to get a chip. And that is when the idea came to us, chicken competition.

We decided survival of the fittest would rule, so we held up the orange triangle that held such power over the flock. We lifted it about 2 feet over their heads in an attempt to taunt them. Just to let them know how was in charge you know. And then it happened, to my amazement Robin cleared the 2 feet and nabbed her a chip. That was when we became fascinated with the chip jump. Robin is the reigning champ and no we don’t have the official measurement of her jump. But she usually comes out of the mix with the Dorito. And no, they won’t jump for a regular potato chip. We have tried various snacks to see which their favorite is and Doritos win hands down. And yes, we have way too much time on our hands.

PETA disclaimer: No chickens were harmed in the amusing of ourselves; however some humans have come out with some nasty scratches.

The Girls